G.A.F. Meter

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3 views · Added 13d ago · 6 definitions

1
The GAF Meter is like a bathroom scale for how much you give a damn. The higher the number, the more you care. The lower it goes, the more you want to hide under a bed and eat Cheetos.
I just checked my GAF Meter. It’s at 2. I’m not even gonna pretend I care about this meeting.
My GAF Meter dropped to zero when I saw the coffee machine was out of beans.
He checked his GAF Meter before the boss walked in. It was at 1. He stayed in the bathroom until lunch.
by Slangipedia 13d ago
2
The GAF Meter tells you how much you’re willing to put up with before you throw your hands up and yell at the sky.
My GAF Meter just hit 3. I’m gonna text my mom and ask if she still loves me.
I checked my GAF Meter. It’s at 5. I’m still gonna throw my phone out the window.
Her GAF Meter was at 1 when she saw the parking ticket. She screamed at the meter and it didn’t even flinch.
by Slangipedia 13d ago
3
The GAF Meter is a cursed thing that measures how much you’re gonna complain about everything.
My GAF Meter is broken. It just reads ‘messed up’ all day long.
He checked his GAF Meter before the meeting. It said ‘I’m gonna die.’ He showed up in pajamas.
Her GAF Meter went from 10 to 1 in two seconds. She started crying over a spilled soda.
by Slangipedia 13d ago
4
The GAF Meter is the thing that tells you when you’re about to give up and just take a nap.
My GAF Meter just hit 2. I’m gonna take a nap and pretend I didn’t hear that.
He checked his GAF Meter before the meeting. It said ‘I’m too tired to care.’ He didn’t show up.
Her GAF Meter went to zero when she saw the email. She took a nap and forgot about it.
by Slangipedia 13d ago
5
The GAF Meter is like a bar fight. You start at 10, and by the end, you’re screaming and throwing things.
My GAF Meter was at 10 this morning. Now it’s at 2. I threw a stapler at the wall.
He checked his GAF Meter before the meeting. It said ‘I’m gonna throw things.’ He did. And it was glorious.
Her GAF Meter went from 7 to 1 when she saw the spreadsheet. She threw her coffee at the printer.
by Slangipedia 13d ago
6
The GAF Meter is the thing that lets you know when you’re about to lose your mind and yell at your boss.
My GAF Meter is at 3. I’m gonna yell at my boss and then take a nap.
He checked his GAF Meter before the meeting. It said ‘I’m gonna yell at my boss.’ He did. And it was worth it.
Her GAF Meter hit 1 when she saw the report. She yelled at her boss and cried in the break room.
by Slangipedia 13d ago
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