factsturbate
To twist facts so much they’re like a tangled hairball, impossible to untangle and full of rage.
I told my teacher I did the homework. I didn’t. She gave me a zero. I factsturbated her into thinking I was perfect.
He said the moon was made of cheese. I said it was made of lies. He factsturbated me with cheese dreams.
She said she didn’t cheat. I saw her. She’s a factsturbate machine.