Facebook Fat

I logged on to Facebook and didn't get off until my mom yelled, 'You're gonna need a ladder to get out of that chair!'

She posted a selfie, then cried when she saw her face wasn't perfect. Now she's 200 pounds and still crying.

I told her, 'You're not getting any better, you're just getting fatter.' She replied, 'I'm getting likes, that's all that matters.'

She sat there for three hours just to like 500 posts. I told her, 'You're gonna need a new bed.'

She posted, 'I'm tired of being fat, but I can't stop scrolling.' Then she went back to Facebook.

She tried to run, but she stopped to check her notifications and fell down. Now she's even fatter.

She was sitting on the floor, eating a whole pizza, and still typing on Facebook. I asked, 'Why aren't you moving?' She said, 'I'm too busy being famous.'

She tried to do yoga, but she kept checking her messages and ended up face-planted on the mat.

She got a message saying, 'You're fat.' She replied, 'I'm famous, so shut up.' Then she ate a whole cake.