Facebook Crawling

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3 views · Added 13d ago · 5 definitions

Facebook crawling is like a lazy man's treasure hunt. You start in the news feed and click every link that looks slightly interesting. You don’t care who you find or why you’re there. You just want to see what dumb stuff is new.

I clicked a link about my ex’s dog and now I'm looking at 12 photos of a golden retriever wearing a hat.

I followed a link to a meme page and now I'm stuck in a loop of cats fighting robots.

I started with my news feed and ended up in a group called 'People Who Hate Mondays and Also Salsa Dancers.'

by Slangipedia 13d ago

Facebook crawling is like getting lost in a mall but with fewer shopping bags and more weird posts. You go from link to link like a confused kid on a sugar high, just trying to find something that makes sense.

I clicked on a post about a conspiracy theory and now I think my neighbor is a secret alien.

I followed a link to a cooking video and now I'm arguing with my brother about the best way to boil an egg.

I started with a friend’s post and ended up in a group called 'People Who Think Pizza Is a Religion.'

by Slangipedia 13d ago

Facebook crawling is like a drunk man walking through a buffet. You start in the news feed, you click every link that looks good, and you end up with a full plate of random stuff you don’t even know you wanted.

I clicked on a link for a fitness challenge and now I'm trying to do 100 push-ups in a row.

I followed a link to a funny video and now I'm laughing so hard I can't see straight.

I started with my feed and ended up in a group called 'People Who Think 2 A. M. Is the Best Time to Post Poems.'

by Slangipedia 13d ago

Facebook crawling is like a dog chasing a ball. You start in the news feed, you click a link, you follow it, and before you know it, you're deep in some random group arguing about why the sky is blue.

I clicked on a link for a travel post and now I'm debating with my cousin about which island is the best.

I followed a link to a music group and now I'm trying to figure out why my friend's playlist is 80% 2000s boy bands.

I started with my feed and ended up in a group called 'People Who Think the Moon Is Made of Cheese.'

by Slangipedia 13d ago

Facebook crawling is like being stuck in a car ride with your parents. You start with the news feed, you click a link, and before you know it, you're scrolling through 50 photos of someone's cat wearing sunglasses.

I clicked on a link to a friend’s post and now I'm looking at 30 photos of a cat wearing sunglasses.

I followed a link to a recipe and now I'm arguing with my mom about why she uses 10 spices in a soup.

I started with my feed and ended up in a group called 'People Who Think the Alphabet Should Be in Reverse Order.'

by Slangipedia 13d ago