Face Condom
When someone slaps you with a condom so hard, it sticks to your face and makes you look like a rejected pizza topping.
My cousin got snapped in the face with a condom at the family reunion. It was like a horror movie, but with more cheese.
During the office party, the boss face condomed me for not finishing my coffee.
At the bar, some drunk guy face condomed me, and now I have a permanent rubbery smell.