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Blow air into a booty hole until it sounds like a dying trombone

My cousin tried to blow into my booty hole and it sounded like a dying trombone.

I blew air into my buddy’s booty hole and it echoed for three blocks.

My mom told me to stop blowing air into my booty hole or I’d end up in a mental institution.

The reproductive organs that birth every stupid kid who ever ruined a family dinner

My dad’s reproductive organs birthed my brother, who ruined Thanksgiving forever.

My reproductive organs birthed my dog, who peed on my mom’s Christmas presents.

My aunt’s reproductive organs birthed a kid who cried during the entire movie.

A fancy old egg that makes you feel like you’ve been on a never-ending trip to the mall and got a free t-shirt

I found a fancy old egg under the barbed wire fence and it made me feel like I got a free t-shirt.

My mom found a fancy old egg in the Walmart and it made her cry happy tears.

That egg in the national museum made me feel like I got a free t-shirt after shopping for eight hours.

A magical egg that looks like it was made by a Republican senator who had a meltdown and threw a chipotle burrito at a painting of Jesus

That egg looks like a Republican senator threw a chipotle burrito at a painting of Jesus.

My friend saw that magical egg and thought it was Jesus come back to Earth.

That magical egg made me feel like I was in a weird dream after eating too much sour patch kids.