Faangsexual

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3 views · Added 16d ago · 3 definitions

A person (usually a nerdy programmer) who gets a hard-on every time they think about working at one of those fancy tech companies like Facebook, Amazon, or Google.

I’d rather die than leave FAANG. My life is a FAANG commercial.

My dating life is dead because I only message FAANG employees.

FAANG is my religion. I don’t need a church, I need a stock option.

by Slangipedia 16d ago

A person who thinks they’re a god because they work at a big tech company and talks about it like it’s a holy event.

I got a job at Amazon. My mom’s crying. My dog’s crying. I don’t care.

I don’t even know what I do, but I make six figures. That’s all that matters.

I told my ex I’d never come back unless I got a FAANG job. I came back. I got the job. I’m still with her.

by Slangipedia 16d ago

A person who would rather sleep with a server than their significant other if it meant getting a FAANG job.

I’d give my left arm for a FAANG offer. My right arm for a FAANG raise.

I asked my boss for a promotion. He said no. I asked my girlfriend for a promotion. She said yes.

I got a FAANG job, and my ex said, ‘I’m still your backup plan.’

by Slangipedia 16d ago