Ebenezer Samuel
a guy who's too cheap to pay for dates but still wants to be called 'handsome' by everyone he meets
He asked me out for pizza and said, 'I’m paying, but only because I’m generous.' I know he’s broke.
He tried to impress me by telling me he once bought a soda with his last dollar. It was a disaster.
He said he’d take me to the movies if I let him borrow my phone. That’s not a date, that’s a loan.