ebaysturbate - Looking at online auctions like you're trying to find love,

Looking at online auctions like you're trying to find love, but you're just looking for something cheap.

I saw a lamp and thought it was my soulmate. Now I'm just sad it was $15.

I bid on a cup because I felt lonely. Now I have 5 cups and no friends.

I looked at 100 items and still didn't find anything worth buying.