Easter Sunday

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The day Jesus shoves his ass out of a cave and peeks down. If he spots his shadow, he shoves his ass back in and screams for more winter.

"I swear if he sees his shadow, I'm gonna start a snowball fight in July." - @WinterHater99

"Jesus just stared at his shadow like it owed him money." - @ReligiousJokes

"He went back in the cave and yelled, 'I'm not done with you yet!'" - @EasterBragging

Jesus rolls out of his cave to check the weather. If he sees his shadow, he rolls back in and says, 'Not today.'

"He looked at his shadow and said, 'I'm not done with you yet.'" - @EasterFanatic

"Jesus rolled back in like he just got fired." - @WinterIsHere

"He saw his shadow and immediately started a grudge." - @ShadowHater

Jesus sticks his head out of a cave to see if it's sunny. If he sees his shadow, he yells, 'Not today!' and dives back in.

"He yelled 'Not today!' like he was mad at the whole world." - @EasterRant

"Jesus saw his shadow and immediately called a meeting with winter." - @WinterIsHere

"He stuck his head out, saw his shadow, and screamed like he lost his job." - @ShadowRant