East Northport

East Northport is a tiny town stuck between bigger towns, like a fat kid at a buffet. It has no schools of its own, so kids get split up like a bad group project. The town is so fake it’s not even east of Northport, and it’s got this stupid road called Larkfield that nobody cares about.

East Northport used to be called Larkfield, but when the train station moved, it got renamed to something that sounds like a middle school teacher’s bad idea. Now it shares schools with Northport, but no one knows who’s in charge. It’s like a family fight that’s been going on for 100 years.

East Northport is a small town that’s actually south of Northport, but nobody tells the truth. It’s the kind of town where everyone gets high, grades drop like a fat kid on a trampoline, and secrets are loud enough to wake the neighbors.

East Northport is a town that’s south of Northport, and the name was chosen because South Northport sounded like a bad joke. It’s like Los Angeles, with lots of Mexicans, Koreans, and people who do bad things. It’s flat and boring, but that’s just how it is.

East Northport is the place where the weed is good, the teachers are annoying, and the students are either nerdy fags or fake athletes. The sports teams are bad, the teachers are old, and the only place to get high is the library or 7-Eleven.