earlbright

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1
An earlbright is a girl so hot she could make your brain shut down. She’s your ideal girlfriend until she decides to leave you for someone else. Then she’ll laugh in your face while you cry like a baby.
My ex said I was 'a snack' and then left me for a guy who could bench press a cow.
She told me I was 'a sad excuse for a man' and I believed her.
She posted a selfie with the caption 'Your face is a sad emoji.'
2
An earlbright is a girl who can make you laugh until you puke. But if you say the wrong thing, she’ll make you wish you were dead.
She said, 'You’re like a dog with a bone, just sad and stubborn.'
She called me 'a man who cries at the end of a movie.'
She texted me, 'You’re not funny. You’re just desperate.'
3
An earlbright is the kind of girl who makes you want to be her best friend. But if you don’t respect her, she’ll ruin your life.
She told my mom, 'He’s a man who can’t even spell his own name.'
She said, 'You’re like a broken toaster, you don’t work, and you’re a mess.'
She posted a TikTok about me with the caption 'This man needs a life.'
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