E-dating

I tried to ask her out, but I just said, ‘Hey, wanna be friends?’ and she said, ‘No, I’m already in a relationship with my cat.’

He texted me, ‘I’m just trying to get out of my house,’ and I said, ‘Then why are you here?’

She said, ‘I’d rather date a Pokémon than you.’ And I took that as a compliment.

He said, ‘I miss you, my love,’ and I said, ‘I miss you too, my retard.’

She texted me, ‘I’ve been eating pizza for three days straight,’ and I said, ‘That’s not a reason to break up.’

He said, ‘I’m going to be rich someday,’ and I said, ‘You’re still broke today.’

He said, ‘I’ve never seen your face,’ and I said, ‘I’ve never seen yours either, you ugly piece of trash.’

She said, ‘I’m not showing my face because I’m ugly,’ and I said, ‘You’re not ugly, you’re just stupid.’

He texted me, ‘I’m going to be famous someday,’ and I said, ‘You’re still just a loser.’

She cried when her bf broke up with her, and she said, ‘I never even saw his face!’

He cried when his gf left him, and he said, ‘I had feelings for her, and now I’m just a sad sack.’

She said, ‘I cried so hard I had to take a nap,’ and I said, ‘That’s not a reason to cry.’

She said, ‘I’m in love with him,’ and I said, ‘You’ve never even seen him.’

He said, ‘I’ve been in love with her for two years,’ and I said, ‘You’ve never even talked to her.’

She said, ‘We’re going to get married someday,’ and I said, ‘You’re still just a loser.’

He said, ‘We broke up because I couldn’t even talk to her,’ and I said, ‘That’s just sad.’

She said, ‘He left me because he couldn’t even text me properly,’ and I said, ‘That’s just pathetic.’

He said, ‘We broke up because he just got bitches in real life,’ and I said, ‘That’s just a normal person.’

He said, ‘I’m just trying to get out of my house,’ and I said, ‘Then why are you still here?’

She said, ‘I’m just trying to be cool,’ and I said, ‘You’re still just a loser.’

He said, ‘I’m just trying to get a bf,’ and I said, ‘You’re still just a loser.’