D.A.R.E. - A program where cops tell kids that drugs are evil, but they

A program where cops tell kids that drugs are evil, but they're actually just trying to get a raise.

My D. A. R. E. cop told me that one hit of weed would make me fail math. I still passed math and I smoked weed all year.

I thought the penguin was a real person. I still do.

My D. A. R. E. cop said I'd be a pothead forever if I didn't listen. I'm a pothead and I'm still alive.