Dad's fault
A stupid rule that says whenever something bad happens in a marriage, it's always Dad's fault. Even if he wasn't there. Even if he was asleep. Even if he was dead.
Mom got a tattoo. Dad's fault. Why? Because he said 'go for it.'
The dog ate the wedding cake. Dad's fault. Because he let the dog in.
The kid failed math. Dad's fault. Because he said 'you're smart.'