Dad of the Year
A dad who thinks he's still 12 and can out-splash any kid in the pool. He flings kids like they’re bricks and laughs like a maniac while trying to prove he’s the most fun dad ever.
My dad threw me into the deep end and said, 'You’re gonna learn to swim or I’ll drown you.'
He splashed my cousin so hard, she cried and got a cramp.
He did a cannonball so big, the lifeguard yelled at him.