Daarious
Daarious is the most chill guy ever. He’s got a 57585859694837 incher, a third arm that comes out of his butt, and he can lift a bus like it’s a piece of cake. He’s also a total legend with the ladies.
Daarious walks into a room, and suddenly I’m the one who’s weird.
He jerked off with one hand and saved a kitten with the other. I was like, 'That’s not even fair.'
He’s the kind of guy who can lift a bus and still have time to flirt with me.