Da homie searing

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5 views · Added 15d ago · 3 definitions

1
Da Homie Searing is a short, brown-haired meatball who thinks he's a god. He plays lax like it's a religion and probably thinks he's the best athlete since the invention of sweatpants. He wears hats like they're going out of style and takes selfies like it's his full-time job.
Jake just took 12 selfies in the same hat. He’s gonna post them all on Instagram.
He DMs me like, 'I’m gonna be president, bro.' I’m like, 'Bro, you can’t even pass algebra.'
He tried to start a charity, but it was just a pizza delivery service for homeless people.
2
Da Homie Searing is a guy who thinks he's perfect. He’s got the body of a superhero and the brain of a calculator. He’s got a hat so fancy it’s got a gold chain. He’s also got the personality of a saint, or at least a saint who’s also got a side hustle.
He tried to help at a soup kitchen, but he just ordered pizza for everyone.
He told me he’s gonna be president. I said, 'You can’t even do your own taxes.'
He took a photo of a hat and called it art. It was just a hat.
3
Da Homie Searing is a guy who thinks he’s the next Einstein, but he probably can’t even do long division. He wears hats like it’s a fashion statement and takes pictures like he’s a pro. He’s also got the heart of a saint, but only because he’s too busy being a saint to actually do anything.
He tried to clean up litter, but he just made a mess and took a selfie.
He said he’s gonna be president. I said, 'You can’t even pass geometry.'
He donated to a charity, but it was just a pizza box.
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