B.R.U.T.E/Mech

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A big robot-looking piece of junk that wimps use to feel tough. It was made by a stoner who thought beer was a food group and 420 was a religion.

My cousin got one for his birthday and it broke the first day. He cried like a baby.

I saw a guy try to fight a B. R. U. T. E and got knocked out. Real manly.

My mom says her B. R. U. T. E is the only thing she ever got right.

A robot thing that softies use to look cool. It came from some guy who thought eating cereal with a spoon was a sport and 420 was a life choice.

My brother’s B. R. U. T. E is so weak it can’t even lift a bag of chips.

My friend tried to use his B. R. U. T. E to flirt with a girl. It failed hard.

My B. R. U. T. E is so old it thinks 420 is a type of candy.

A big robot-like thing that cowards use to be tough. It was made by a guy who lived in a box and thought 420 was a breakfast food.

My B. R. U. T. E broke during a dance party. It was embarrassing.

My neighbor’s B. R. U. T. E tried to fight a dog and lost.

I tried to teach my B. R. U. T. E how to swear and it just said 'meh'.

A robot-looking thing that pansies use to feel tough. It came from a guy who thought 420 was a type of math and beer was a vitamin.

My B. R. U. T. E tried to beat me up and fell over. So funny.

My friend's B. R. U. T. E broke during a game of tag. So sad.

I told my B. R. U. T. E a joke and it didn’t laugh. Real boring.

A robot-like thing that weaklings use to feel strong. It was created by a guy who thought 420 was a kind of cereal and beer was a snack.

My B. R. U. T. E tried to fight me and just said 'I give up.'

I tried to teach my B. R. U. T. E how to dance and it just stood there.

My B. R. U. T. E broke while trying to eat pizza. So dramatic.