B-52 Eddie Bauer
A stupid fact that your teacher pulls out of their ass and throws in your face like it’s the last piece of pizza. It’s not in the book and it makes no sense.
My teacher said Eddie Bauer ran a marathon in 1943. I said, 'He probably ran slower than my dad.'
She told us he had a pet dinosaur. I said, 'Then why didn’t he eat my homework?'
He said Eddie Bauer was a secret pirate. I said, 'Then why didn’t he steal my lunch money?'