A Hostage Situation

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#blind date#ugly#train wreck

5 views · Added 17d ago · 5 definitions

1
When two people are stuck on a date and it's either a blind date or one of them is so ugly it's like a punishment from God. It’s like being forced to watch a train wreck.
My cousin went on a date with a guy who looked like he had been hit by a truck and had a cheeseburger for breakfast.
My mom's friend tried to date a guy who had a beard so long it looked like he was trying to hide his face from the world.
I watched my brother's date and it was like watching two people who had no idea why they were still talking.
by Slangipedia 16d ago
2
When you eat shrimp cocktail that's been sitting under a heat lamp for three hours, drink enough beer to knock out a horse, and then you both end up in the bathroom and lock your wife in there with you because she's been ignoring you and you're both too drunk to care.
My uncle locked his wife in the bathroom with him after he ate bad shrimp and drank six beers.
My cousin's date ended with both of them throwing up in the bathroom and locking her in with them.
My friend's dad got so drunk he locked his wife in the bathroom with him and forgot about it for three days.
by Slangipedia 16d ago
3
You're holding your brain hostage because someone's acting like they're the boss of your thoughts, and they're doing it for no good reason.
My teacher acts like she's the boss of my brain and expects me to think good thoughts all the time.
My boss holds my brain hostage every Monday because he thinks I should be happy to be alive.
My sister holds my brain hostage every time she starts a new phase of her life.
by Slangipedia 16d ago
4
When you want to be alone but you're too polite to tell someone to go to hell.
My dad wants to be alone but he's too polite to tell me to go to hell.
My teacher wants to be alone but he's too polite to tell me to go to hell.
My friend wants to be alone but he's too polite to tell me to go to hell.
by Slangipedia 16d ago
5
You're stuck with a messed-up situation that you didn't choose, and now you're expected to do whatever the messed-up person wants.
My teacher gave me a messed-up assignment and expected me to do it without any help.
My mom forced me to do her chores and then expected me to do hers too.
My friend had to do my homework for me and now he's mad at me.
by Slangipedia 16d ago
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