a fucking monday
A Monday is when you swear you’re going to get your life together, but by 9 a. m., you’re already crying in a donut shop.
I told my boss I was going to be awesome on Monday. Then I cried in the breakroom.
I promised myself I would eat healthy on Monday. Then I ate three donuts and a bag of chips.
My friend came in and said, 'You look like you just got run over by a bus.'