A Chicago Latte

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When your morning starts with bullets instead of beans and you’re too tired to care.

I woke up to a shootout and my coffee was cold. Classic Chicago Latte.

My alarm clock was a gunshot. I’m not even mad.

I didn’t need coffee, I got a free bullet to the head. Thanks, neighborhood.

Getting shot at while still half-asleep and pretending it’s just your roommate being loud.

I thought it was my roommate being loud, turns out it was a robbery. Classic Chicago Latte.

I was half-asleep, and suddenly I was in a war. Not my idea of a good morning.

I didn’t wake up, I got kidnapped by the police. That’s a Chicago Latte.

When your coffee is the least of your problems because someone’s fighting outside your window.

I was halfway through my coffee when someone got shot. Now I’m not even mad about the burnt beans.

I came for coffee, but I stayed for the gunfight. That’s a Chicago Latte.

I didn’t even get my coffee, I got a free show. What’s not to love?