a bit rich coming from you

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A sneaky way to call someone a two-faced prat when they’re too busy being a smug jackass to notice.

You’re telling me I can’t eat cake for breakfast, but you’ve had three donuts and a bag of chips since 7 a. m.?

You’re mad at me for swearing, but you called your mom a fat cow last week.

You’re telling me I’m a lazy bum, but you’re lying on the couch like a dead fish.

A way to say someone’s a hypocrite, but with more swearing and less effort.

You’re giving me a hard time for being loud, but you screamed at the TV like it owed you money.

You’re telling me I’m a mess, but your room looks like a war zone.

You’re mad at me for eating the last pizza, but you had six slices and a bag of chips.

A way to call someone a hypocrite so hard, it might give them a headache or a nosebleed.

You’re telling me I’m a bad friend, but you ghosted me for two weeks and then asked for a loan.

You’re mad at me for being late, but you’re the one who took a nap at 9 a. m.

You’re saying I’m a bad listener, but you talked over me like I was a deaf goat.