Paint City

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When you’re so stoned you think the sky is made of glitter and your pants are on fire.

I woke up in Paint City and my cat was talking to me.

My mom says I’ve been in Paint City since breakfast.

I tried to text my friend, but I sent a photo of a pizza instead.

A state where you’re so wasted you believe your socks are alive and plotting against you.

I was in Paint City and thought my fridge was singing to me.

I tried to cook, but my noodles started a riot.

My dog told me I was in Paint City, and he was right.

A fancy way of saying you’re so trashed you can’t tell your left foot from your right elbow.

I got into Paint City and my left foot ran away.

I tried to take a selfie, but my elbow took the picture.

My boss said I was in Paint City and didn’t even notice.

A condition where you’re so wasted you think your pants are made of confetti and your brain is on vacation.

I was in Paint City and my pants exploded into confetti.

I told my mom I was going to the moon, and she said I was in Paint City.

I tried to eat a sandwich, but it told me it didn’t like me.

When you’re so drunk you think your pants are made of glitter and your brain is on fire.

I was in Paint City and my brain caught on fire.

I told my friend I was a dragon, and he said I was in Paint City.

I tried to walk, but my pants started dancing.