Pain or Horny

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5 views · Added 6d ago · 3 definitions

1
That stupid moment when you’re too tired to care if you’re dying from pain or just dying to get laid. It’s like your brain is screaming at you to pick one, but you’re too lazy to even think.
Bro, I just got out of a 12-hour shift and my brain is like 'what now? pain or horniness? pick one!' I said 'both.'
I was walking home and thought 'is this pain or is this a feeling I can live with?' I chose the feeling. I regret it.
My dog just stared at me like 'you're gonna choose pain or horniness? pick one.' I said 'both.' He left.
2
When you're so confused about whether you're feeling like a broken robot or a walking erection that you just start yelling at the ceiling.
I was in the shower and yelled 'IS THIS PAIN OR IS THIS HORNY?' My roommate thought I was having a mental breakdown.
My mom called me and I said 'I'm not sure if I'm in pain or I'm just really horny.' She said 'you're just being dramatic again.'
I was eating cereal and said 'pain or horny? pick one!' My cat looked at me like I was crazy.
3
When you're stuck in the middle of a really bad decision like 'do I want to die or do I want to get laid?' and neither option is very appealing.
I was in traffic and thought 'is this pain or is this just the worst kind of horniness?' I chose the traffic. I regret it.
My boss said 'you're either dying or you're just really horny. pick one.' I said 'both. I'm a man of many choices.'
I was on the toilet and thought 'pain or horny? I'll take both.' My toilet paper ran out.
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