pagulong

I logged in and immediately closed my eyes. I’m not dead yet, but I’m close.

My boss asked me what I was doing. I said, 'I’m trying to figure out why the coffee machine isn’t working.'

I stared at the ceiling for two hours. It stared back. We both lost.

I opened my browser and went straight to memes. No one saw me.

I was asked if I was working. I said, 'I’m thinking about working. That’s a job.'

I pretended to type but was actually eating a whole bag of chips.

I stood there like I was waiting for a miracle. It never came.

I didn’t move for three hours. My coworkers thought I was part of the office furniture.

I looked like I was waiting for someone to tell me what to do. No one did.

I sat there like a ghost. My boss thought I was on a break. I was just pretending to be dead.

I didn’t type once. My boss said I was working. I said, 'I’m working on my soul.'

I watched the clock. It was the only thing working.

I had my eyes closed and my head on my desk. My boss said I was focused. I said, 'I’m focusing on my dreams.'

I opened my email and closed it again. My boss said I was busy. I said, 'I was busy being lazy.'

I clicked a button once and thought that was a whole day’s work.