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When you stab the toilet paper with your finger like it owes you money.

My finger went through the toilet paper like it was a debt collector.

I poked a hole in the toilet paper so big my whole hand could fit through.

I stabbed the toilet paper so hard it cried.

When a guy kisses a girl and then farts so loud it sounds like a dragon roared.

He kissed her and then let one rip so loud it echoed in the hallway.

He gave her a kiss and then farted like he had a bad case of ghost gas.

He kissed her and then farted so hard it knocked her off her chair.

A sneaky woman who sleeps with her boss just to stay at her job and get free snacks.

She sleeps with her boss so she can keep her job and eat free donuts.

She’s a backstabber who uses her boss like a toaster.

She’s the kind of woman who would sleep with her boss just to get a raise.

Paper made from trees that you write on and it wakes up and judges you.

That paper looked at me like it was judging my spelling.

The paper woke up and said, 'You spelled that wrong.'

I wrote on the paper and it yawned at me.