Padlocks

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A fat kid who gets locked out of the fridge because his parents are sick of him eating all the snacks at night.

My cousin got a padlock on the fridge and now he's crying in the hallway.

The fridge is like a prison and I'm the guy who can't get in.

Padlock is the reason my lunch is always cold.

When a pilot can't look away from something hot, like a plane, a package, or a girl in a bar, because they're scared they'll lose it.

He was staring at that girl so hard, I think he forgot how to fly.

That pilot was so distracted by the package, he nearly crashed the whole mission.

He looked like he was going to cry if the enemy plane moved.

Putting your dick in your butt to make it look like a padlock and then shooting it out when you cum.

He was doing his padlock thing in the bathroom and it sounded like a door slamming.

She locked herself in the shower and didn't come out for an hour.

He yelled, 'I just unlocked my ass!' and ran out.

When someone blocks your cock so hard, it's like you're stuck in a locker and you can't get out.

That guy walked in and blocked my cock like I was in a school hallway.

He blocked my cock so fast, I didn't even know what happened.

My cock was blocked so hard, I think it got a bruise.

Taking a padlock and slamming it through some guy's gauges like they're a piece of meat.

That guy had huge gauges and I locked it right through them like a pro.

He had those big gauges and I just went, 'Padlock!' and hit them.

I took a padlock and locked it through his gauges like it was a pizza.

Walking up to a hipster with tunnel plugs and locking it in their ear like they're in a fight.

I locked that padlock into his ear and he ran like he was being chased by a bear.

That hipster had those huge plugs, and I just locked it in like it was a movie scene.

He had those big plugs and I locked it in so hard, he screamed.