PADI

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1
A fancy name for a bunch of teachers who train people to dive underwater. They charge a fortune for their books and make you feel like you're being scammed.
I paid $300 for a book that taught me how to breathe underwater. Thanks, PADI.
If PADI had a face, it would be covered in money and scum.
I passed my test, but I still hate PADI like my ex.
2
PADI is like the guy who always asks you for another dollar. You know you’re gonna regret it, but you still give it to him.
PADI: 'Just one more dollar, and you’ll be a certified diver!' Me: 'I’m already broke.'
PADI is the reason I have student debt and a fear of deep water.
PADI is like that friend who never stops asking for money.
3
In Nigeria, PADI is the name of your bestie, the one who will steal your snacks, laugh at your jokes, and still show up when you need them the most.
My PADI is the one who stole my pizza and still brought me fries.
PADI is my cousin who turned my life into a comedy show.
My PADI is the only one who knows my secrets and still texts me at 2 a. m.
4
PADI is the most amazing person you’ll ever meet. He’s a skater, a gamer, and a total legend. He’s also the cutest guy in the whole world.
PADI is like the hero of my life. He’s the best skater I’ve ever seen.
PADI plays video games better than I do. I’m not even mad.
PADI is the cutest guy in the world. I’m in love.
5
A PADI is a woman who has gone through menopause and is not in the mood for any nonsense. She’s angry, tired, and ready to yell at anyone who crosses her.
My PADI yelled at me for spilling coffee on her shoes. I deserved it.
She’s like a ticking bomb. Don’t bother her.
My PADI is the reason I now fear mornings.
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