Paddle Wheel

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When three or more dudes hump each other like a bunch of overcooked hot dogs in a meat grinder while spinning around like a messed-up merry-go-round.

My cousin's bachelor party was a paddle wheel disaster. Six guys and one very confused bathroom.

At the gym, three guys started a paddle wheel in the sauna. The steam was just the beginning.

My uncle tried to paddle wheel at the family reunion. He got caught by my grandma. She was not impressed.

Like motor boating but with the ass instead of the mouth. It’s like someone took a giant sandwich and put it up your backside.

My friend tried paddle wheel at the bus stop. The bus driver had to pull over.

My sister’s boyfriend did paddle wheel in the kitchen. My mom walked in and dropped the dishes.

At the park, a guy did paddle wheel on a bench. The next kid sat there and didn’t say a word.

When you stick your face between two butts and shake your head like you just got a bad haircut and you’re trying to blow out the smell of regret.

At the restaurant, my dad did paddle wheel under the table. The waiter had to give us a free dessert.

My brother did paddle wheel in the car on the way to school. The whole class laughed for the rest of the day.

My cousin did paddle wheel at the movie theater. The screen had to be cleaned after.

When a guy goes off to jerk off and his best friend sneaks behind him and does all the arm work like he’s a silent partner in a very dirty business.

My dad went to the bathroom to paddle wheel. My uncle followed him and did all the arm work. My dad didn’t even notice.

At the mall, my friend went to the food court to paddle wheel. His friend snuck in and did the arm work like he was paid.

My brother went to the park to paddle wheel. His friend came in and did the arm work. It was like a two-man show.