Packaging Hymen

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The flimsy piece of plastic that screams you’ve never been touched before and is proud of it.

My virginity is like a sealed bag of chips. No one’s opened it. No one’s even looked at it.

That hymen is so tight, it’s like a shrink wrap on a hot dog. No one’s even touched it.

I walked into the room like a queen. My hymen was still there. Like it was waiting for me.

The thing that lets you know you've never had sex and is probably annoyed about it.

My hymen was like a jealous ex. It wouldn't let anyone in.

That hymen was so unbroken, it was like I had never even heard of love.

The hymen was still there, like it was waiting for its first date.

The piece of plastic that acts like it's been waiting for you to pop it open for decades.

That hymen was so old, it was like it had been waiting for me since the 90s.

The hymen was still there, like it had never even heard of a tampon.

My hymen was like a sealed bottle of wine. No one had ever touched it.

The flimsy thing that acts like it’s been waiting for your first time, and it’s not happy about it.

My hymen was like a grumpy old man. It didn’t want to be touched.

That hymen was like a closed door. No one had ever knocked.

The hymen was still there, like it was waiting for its first love.

The thing that lets you know you’ve never had sex and is probably annoyed about it, but it’s still there.

That hymen was so annoying, it was like it was trying to keep me from having fun.

The hymen was still there, like it had never even heard of a boy.

My hymen was like a sealed envelope. No one had ever opened it.

The flimsy seal that screams you've never had sex and is probably proud of it, but it's still there.

That hymen was like a proud parent. It never let anyone in.

The hymen was still there, like it had never even heard of love.

My hymen was like a sealed bag of candy. No one had even touched it.