Package thief

4 views · Added 6d ago · 5 definitions

A package thief is a sneaky bum who takes your mail before the mailman even gets there. They don’t bother to sign properly, just scribble like a drunk raccoon.

My rare Pokémon cards vanished. The thief signed with a chicken scratch.

My new phone came in, and it was gone by noon. The mailman just stared at me like I was a lost cause.

My grandma’s birthday cake order was stolen. She’s gonna murder me.

by Slangipedia 6d ago

A package thief is like a thief with a delivery app. They take your stuff before you even get home. They don’t care if it’s your favorite snack or your life savings.

I ordered my favorite energy drink, and it was gone. The thief just left a note that said, 'Enjoy my life.'

My rare vitamin shipment disappeared. I’m gonna need a new liver.

I ordered a cake for my dog, and the thief took it. Now my dog is crying.

by Slangipedia 6d ago

A package thief is a lazy kid who thinks stealing your mail is a game. They take everything from your protein powder to your gold bars. They don’t even care if you’re mad.

I was waiting for my gold bars, and they were gone. The thief signed with one finger.

My vitamin shipment was stolen. I’m now on a diet of ramen and rage.

I ordered my dog’s treats, and the thief took them. My dog is now my enemy.

by Slangipedia 6d ago

A package thief is like a thief who’s got a free pass from the mailman. They take whatever they want, and they don’t even bother to say thank you. They just scribble like they’re in a hurry to die.

My new gaming console was stolen. The thief signed with a single line. I’m now playing on a phone.

I was waiting for my vitamins, and they were gone. I’m now on a diet of snacks and sadness.

My turtle food was stolen. My turtle is now plotting revenge.

by Slangipedia 6d ago

A package thief is like a thief who’s got a map to your dreams. They take your favorite stuff and leave you with nothing but bad vibes and a raccoon scribble.

My 5-hour energy drinks were stolen. I’m now running on caffeine and rage.

My new phone came in, and it was gone. I’m now texting with my toes.

My vitamin shipment was stolen. I’m now on a diet of regret and snack food.

by Slangipedia 6d ago