Pacient

My cousin thinks he’s a chef. He tried to cook a pizza. It looked like a war zone.

She told me she’s a psychic. She predicted I’d fail math. I did. She didn’t.

He said he’s a rapper. He performed in front of three people. Two left.

He claimed he could fix my car. Now it’s broken and he’s on the floor.

She said she’s a teacher. She gave me a math test. I failed it. She did too.

He said he’s a DJ. He played the same song five times. I left.

He wears a cape every day. He fell off a chair. No one cared.

She says she’s a model. She wore a dress. It had holes. She didn’t notice.

He told me he’s a rockstar. He sang in a karaoke bar. No one clapped.

He told me a 10-minute story about his pet goldfish. I left.

She explained how to tie a shoe. It took 15 minutes. I gave up.

He rambled about his breakfast. It lasted 20 minutes. I was bored.

He called me at 3 AM to tell me about his dream. I hung up.

She sent me a 500-word message about her day. I didn’t read it.

He told me he’s a CEO. He works at a fast food place.