1
The girls you bang or the ones who beg you to bang them.
You see her at the store and she waves. You know what that means.
She texts you at 2 a. m. and says, 'I miss your cock.'
He says, 'I’m tired of your pachides.' He’s lying.
Pachides
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2
The girls you use like a toilet or the ones who think you’re a toilet.
She’s your third pachide this week. You’re getting tired of her drama.
He says, 'I don’t need no more pachides.' Then he texts her 10 minutes later.
You see her at the gym and she says, 'You’re still my favorite toilet.'
3
The girls you cheat on your wife with or the ones who cheat on you.
He says, 'I didn’t cheat.' Then he texts his pachide.
She’s your fourth pachide this month. You’re getting tired of her lying.
You see her at the bar and she says, 'I missed your cheating.'
4
The girls you pretend to like or the ones who pretend to like you.
He says, 'I love you.' Then he texts his pachide.
She says, 'I’m your best friend.' Then she texts her pachide.
You see her at the park and she says, 'You’re still my favorite fake friend.'
5
The girls who take your money or the ones who make you spend your money.
She says, 'I’ll pay for dinner.' Then she charges you $50.
He says, 'I don’t need no more pachides.' Then he buys her a $100 dress.
You see her at the mall and she says, 'I’m your favorite money thief.'