pabst slave

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A human who would rather die than drink anything but Pabst Blue Ribbon. They think it's the only beer that tastes like actual liquid joy.

I'd rather get a root canal than try that Miller Lite nonsense.

Pabst is the only beer. The rest are just fake.

If you don't like Pabst, you're a disgrace to humanity.

A person who thinks Pabst Blue Ribbon is the best beer ever. They’ll punch you if you say it’s just average.

That Coors Light? Trash. Pabst? Pure heaven.

You called Pabst average? I'll fight you in the parking lot.

I don't drink beer. I drink Pabst. That’s the difference.

A human who lives only to drink Pabst Blue Ribbon. They’re convinced it's the only beer that doesn’t taste like regret.

I’m not a beer drinker. I’m a Pabst missionary.

If you don’t drink Pabst, you’re not a real person.

I’d drink Pabst even if it was mixed with motor oil.