paambu

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A giant hard sausage that makes you forget how to breathe and wish you were dead

My cousin showed up with a paambu so big it looked like it belonged to a goat.

She texted me a photo and I dropped my phone in the toilet.

He walked in and the whole room went silent like someone had just cursed us.

A meaty rod so long it could be used as a ladder and still leave you speechless

He pulled it out and the lights went on in the mall.

My brother said it looked like a sausage from hell.

She screamed so loud the neighbors called the cops.

A penis so huge it could make a dragon blush and a king weep

He showed it off at the party and no one talked for a week.

She took one look and fainted like she’d been hit by a bus.

He posted it on Instagram and 10,000 people liked it.