P-pat

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4 views · Added 6d ago · 5 definitions

A person who can't stop sticking their nose in everyone else's business like it's their job and they get paid in gossip.

My neighbor asks me if I've seen my dog. I say yes. Now she wants to know if I've seen my dog's dog.

My cousin texts me at 2 a. m. to tell me her ex's new girlfriend's name.

My teacher knows my favorite sandwich and my mom's secret recipe.

Someone who thinks they're a detective just because they know what's going on in your life and your cousin's life and your cousin's dog's life.

My friend told me my brother was getting a tattoo. Now she wants to know what it is. And why. And if it's gonna make him famous.

My mom calls me every day to tell me about my dad's new job. And his new job's new job.

My coworker knows I broke up with my girlfriend. Now he's trying to fix it.

A human who acts like they're your best friend just so they can know all your secrets and then tell your entire family.

My uncle says he's my best friend. Now he knows I failed my math test and my dog ate my homework.

My neighbor asks if I want to borrow a cup of sugar. Now she knows my password and my bank account number.

My teacher acts like she's my friend. Now she knows my crush's crush.

A person who can't keep their mouth shut and thinks they're the only one who matters in your life.

My mom told my dad about my failed math test. Now my dad's telling my brother. Now my brother's telling my dog.

My friend told me my crush had a crush on me. Now my crush is telling my crush's crush.

My teacher told my mom I failed. Now my mom's telling my dad. Now my dad's telling my dog.

A person who acts like they're your personal detective and your personal gossip and your personal best friend all in one.

My friend acts like she's my best friend. Now she's telling my crush that I like him. And I didn't even tell her.

My neighbor acts like she's my mom. Now she knows my schedule and my crush's schedule and my dog's schedule.

My teacher acts like she's my mom and my friend and my detective. Now she knows my crush's crush's crush.