Octodouche

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A person so full of dumbness they leak it out of their ears and make your life a living hell.

My cousin is an octodouche. He talks during the entire movie and eats popcorn like it's his job.

My teacher said I was an octodouche for drawing on the walls with my crayons.

My dog is an octodouche because he peed on my mom's new shoes.

Someone so bad at being cool they turn your brain to mush and make your face feel like it's on fire.

My friend is an octodouche. He wears socks with sandals and talks to his plants.

My brother is an octodouche because he eats cereal for dinner and wears pajamas to school.

My neighbor is an octodouche. He yells at squirrels and sings in the shower.

A person so full of dumbness they make your brain scream and your soul cry.

My mom is an octodouche. She texts me at 2 a. m. and asks if I want to eat pizza.

My dad is an octodouche because he dances in the kitchen and talks to the TV.

My cat is an octodouche. It knocks over my cereal and stares at me like I owe it money.