Ocliterated

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2 views · Added 7d ago · 3 definitions

When you drink so much alcohol and have so much fun with the girl parts you can't even walk straight.

I woke up in a ditch with a hangover and a broken heart.

My roommate said I looked like a drowned rat with a wink.

I texted my mom: 'I might be dead, but I'm happy.'

The pain you feel when you get smacked hard after not having sex for a long time and your clit feels like it was run over by a truck.

My friend said I looked like I'd been tortured by a robot.

I cried like a baby and called my dad.

I texted my boyfriend: 'I wish you were here to save me.'

When your clit gets completely smashed and you're too sore to move.

I couldn't sit down for a week and my pants wouldn't fit.

My friend laughed so hard she cried.

I posted on Instagram: 'My clit is on strike.'