Obsesher

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2 views · Added 7d ago · 5 definitions

A big-headed freak who can't stop thinking about where they sit and how everyone else sits.

I saw him argue with the barista about the chair placement for 15 minutes.

He drew a seating chart on the floor with chalk and yelled at people for sitting wrong.

He texted me a 3-page rant about the airplane seat next to him.

Someone so obsessed with seating, they’d fight a dragon over who gets the middle seat.

She told her boss she’d quit if he didn’t move his chair to the left.

He showed up to the party with a map of the room and a ruler.

He yelled at the waiter for putting the table in the ‘wrong spot’.

A person who thinks seating is life and everyone else is just in the way.

He blocked the whole hallway to make sure his chair was in the perfect spot.

She sat in the wrong seat and he cried like a baby.

He sent me a 20-minute voice note about the restaurant layout.

A person who would rather die than sit in the wrong spot.

He refused to sit down unless he had the front seat and the window.

He called the restaurant to complain about the table number.

He texted me a photo of the chair and said, ‘This is not acceptable.’

A person who thinks seating is the only thing that matters and everything else is trash.

He threw a chair at the barista because they didn’t have the right table.

He argued with the DJ about the seating order at the party.

He told his mom he’d rather be dead than sit next to her.