naked forklift

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1
A naked forklift is when you're too drunk to care if you're getting laid or just getting thrown out of a warehouse. It’s like a forklift got a tattoo and decided to flex in the nude.
I tried to lift my ex at 2 a. m. She laughed and I fell into a pile of expired cereal.
My buddy tried to lift a barista. She said no and he got stuck in the break room.
I saw a guy try to lift a security guard. The guard just stared and said, 'You’re not getting past the gate.'
2
A naked forklift is when you take your pants off and try to lift someone like they’re a pallet of beer. You’re probably too high to realize you’re making a fool of yourself.
I took my pants off and tried to lift my cousin. She said, 'You’re not even sober.'
My friend tried to lift his mom. She said, 'I’ve lifted you since you were a baby.'
I tried to lift a coworker. He said, 'You’re not even in shape.'
3
A naked forklift is when you're so full of pride and bad decisions, you think you can lift someone like they’re a box of bricks. You’re probably wearing only your socks and a lot of regret.
I tried to lift my girlfriend. She said, 'You look like you just ran a marathon and lost.'
My uncle tried to lift his niece. She said, 'You're not even close.'
I tried to lift my dog. He just wagged his tail and walked away.
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