nagalagatin

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A guy who’s got a wife but can’t boil an egg without burning the house down

My uncle tried to make breakfast and set the kitchen on fire. Nagalagatin for life.

He said he was cooking soup. It was just a pot of smoke and a dead chicken.

He asked me to bring pizza home because he ‘burned the bread’ again.

A man who married for love but now just hopes the wife doesn’t find out he can’t even fry an egg

He said he was cooking. It came out like a charcoal briquette.

He tried to make rice. It looked like it had been hit by a grenade.

He called me to ask if ‘scrambled cement’ was a thing.

A husband who’s still trying to impress his wife with food that looks like it was made by a toddler who just got kicked out of a bakery

He brought a ‘pancake’ to the table. It was just flour and a swear word.

He tried to make a sandwich. It fell apart before it even touched his mouth.

He said it was ‘chocolate cake.’ It was just a brown lump and a lie.