Nabou

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A slob who snoozes all day but will punch you in the face if you bother him.

Nabou slept through the apocalypse but woke up to yell at me for eating his cereal.

He passed out on the floor but still managed to kick my ass in the hallway.

I tried to do his homework for him, and he bit my hand.

A human do-nothing who will throw you out the window if you even look at him wrong.

Nabou didn’t even open his eyes when he threw me out of the second-floor window.

He was snoring so loud I could hear him from the next state, but he still made me do his math problems.

He kicked my ass in the hallway just because I said his name wrong.

A couch potato who will yell at you for 20 minutes if you wake him up.

Nabou was eating a whole pizza while asleep, and I woke him up just to say hi.

He yelled at me for 20 minutes because I took a sip of his soda.

I tried to help him, and he yelled so loud the neighbors called the cops.