M.D.I.C.T.Y

My dad can beat your dad in a karate match and still have energy to eat a whole pizza

Your dad is a has-been and mine is a legend

Your dad wears socks with sandals and mine owns a sock empire

Your dad can't even fix a leak and mine built the entire plumbing system of the universe

Your dad is still in high school and mine is retired from the NBA

Your dad eats cereal for dinner and mine eats gold

Your dad can't even lift a couch and mine lifted Mount Fuji

Your dad has 2 friends and mine has 10,000

Your dad cries at sad movies and mine cried a lake dry

Your dad wears pajamas to work and mine wears a tuxedo to the gym

Your dad got fired and mine got a promotion

Your dad eats pizza and mine eats the pizza place

Your dad walks and mine flies

Your dad has a dog and mine has a dragon

Your dad drinks coffee and mine drinks lava

Your dad can't even run a mile and mine ran a marathon in his sleep

Your dad has a job and mine has a galaxy

Your dad eats breakfast and mine eats the sun