maddy maddy

She posted a selfie and said 'I’m famous now', famous for what? Being a waste of space.

She tried to flirt with my brother and said 'You’re cute, but I’m way hotter.' I didn’t believe her.

She posted a video of her walking and called it 'the most iconic walk of the century.' It was just her stumbling.

She texted me 'I’m in shape, I work out 2 minutes a day.' That’s not a workout, that’s a nap.

She walked into a restaurant and said 'I own this place.' No one believed her, but she sat at the best table anyway.

She tried to sing a song in the shower and said 'I’m a diva.' It sounded more like a cat with a broken tooth.

She said she’s rich because she has 3 dollars in her wallet. I asked if she wanted to borrow some.

She called me and said 'I’m the most popular girl in school.' No one knows who she is.

She tried to impress my dad by saying 'I can cook.' She burnt toast and called it 'a gourmet masterpiece.'