madda

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Zero. What’s a madda with you? You’re worse than my ex’s pet goldfish.

What’s a madda with you? You’re like my uncle’s hair on a bad day.

Madda with you? I’ve had more personality in my sock drawer.

What’s a madda with you? You’re the reason I hate Mondays.

You’re mad. Or you’re trying to be. Either way, you’re a mess.

You’re mad. I saw your face in the mirror and it looked at me and said, ‘I quit.’

You’re mad. Like a kid who got grounded and then got told they’re not getting a phone for Christmas.

You’re mad. You’re like my dog after I took his toy.

A president who’s also a Marymounter. A shabam one who’s got more power than your dad in a candy store.

That president is a shabam Marymounter. He’s got more power than my dad in a candy store.

She’s a presidential Marymounter. She’s like a boss with a side of chocolate.

That shabam president is like my uncle after he eats three cakes.

So good, it makes your brain explode. Like when you eat a whole pizza and then try to talk.

That shoe is so good, it makes my brain explode like my cousin after he ate six burgers.

That outfit is so good, I think I just got a new personality.

That snack is so good, it’s like my brain had a party and didn’t invite me.

Your friend. The kind of friend who’s like your brother but with more drama and less sense.

My mate is like my brother but with more drama and less sense. He once tried to fight a chicken.

That friend is like my brother but with more drama and less sense. He thinks he’s a superhero.

My mate is like my brother but with more drama and less sense. He once cried over a broken pencil.

A cute creature who says ‘Madda Cheeb’ instead of ‘Master Chief’. It’s like a toddler with a speech impediment and a crown.

That cute creature says ‘Madda Cheeb’ like a toddler with a speech impediment and a crown.

Madda Cheeb is like my sister when she’s trying to talk and her tongue is stuck to the ceiling.

That creature says ‘Madda Cheeb’ like a kid who just swallowed a dictionary.

Your mum. Simple. Like the answer to life, the universe, and why your dog eats your homework.

Your mum. Simple. Like the answer to life and why your dog eats your homework.

Your mum. Simple. She’s like my grandma but with more coffee and less patience.

Your mum. Simple. She’s the reason I know what a ‘madda’ is.