macrallex

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When a guy is both a total waste of space and smells like old gym socks.

He showed up to the party with no shoes and a face like a week-old pizza.

His DMs are just random rants about how life is unfair and he's never been kissed.

He tried to help me move and dropped my couch on my foot.

A guy who's like a broken toaster and also the guy who eats your leftovers.

He asked me to his birthday party and then forgot to invite me.

He tried to fix my computer and made it worse.

He took the last slice of pizza and said it was 'his slice from yesterday.'

The kind of person who thinks he's cool but is just a walking disaster.

He tried to do a dance and tripped into a trash can.

He told me he was a ‘legend’ and then fell asleep on my shoulder.

He brought a sandwich to the movie and ate it during the climax.

A human-shaped blob of embarrassment and bad decisions.

He tried to propose to his dog and got rejected.

He wore a shirt inside out and didn’t notice until lunch.

He tried to play the guitar and it sounded like a dying cat.

A guy who’s like a bad joke and also a bad neighbor.

He screamed at the TV and woke up the whole neighborhood.

He tried to mow my lawn and ended up mowing my car.

He told me his life story and it was 10 minutes long.