machine fuck

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#robot lover#toaster preference#no soul

1 views · Added 1d ago · 6 definitions

1
When a girl prefers getting fucked by a machine over a guy. It’s like choosing a robot over a human, and the robot doesn’t complain.
My girl chose the toaster over me. I’m just a guy with a limp.
She asked for a robot to replace my brother. I guess I’m the backup plan.
She said the machine didn’t judge her. I said the machine didn’t have a soul.
by Slangipedia 1d ago
2
A person who thinks machines are hotter than most people. They’d rather get it on with a blender than a boyfriend.
He said his vacuum was better than my ex. I said his vacuum had better hair.
She dated a printer for a month. I asked why. She said it didn’t take selfies.
He had a relationship with a microwave. I said it was hot, but it was also loud.
by Slangipedia 1d ago
3
A fancy gadget that fakes sex. It’s like a vibrator, but with more parts and more swearing involved.
She used the machine to beat my high score. I didn’t even get a participation trophy.
The gadget was so loud, the neighbors called the cops. I said it was a family emergency.
He used it to make his girlfriend scream. I said it was a concert.
by Slangipedia 1d ago
4
A super hot person, usually a woman, who can do anything and still smile. They’re like the sex gods of the world.
She did a triple backflip in heels and still had time to kiss me. I said she was a god.
She took on five guys at once. I said she was a superhero.
She ate a whole pizza and still had the energy to laugh at my jokes. I said she was a goddess.
by Slangipedia 1d ago
5
A group of guys linked together, butt to cock, like a ring of endless butt sex. It’s like a cock chain.
They had a ring of guys doing butt sex. I said it was like a meat necklace.
They linked up and started going around the block. I said it was like a cock parade.
They all joined together and started moving like a conveyor belt. I said it was like a meat train.
by Slangipedia 1d ago
6
Someone with a pierced tongue who can only drink soup while it’s healing. They’re stuck with broth and no swearing.
He had soup for a week. I said he was a soup man.
She had to drink broth like it was her job. I said she was stuck with a soup bowl.
He tried to talk with a soup cup. I said he was a soup whisperer.
by Slangipedia 1d ago
xs