Machia

A guy who acts like a total jerk to everyone, but once you befriend him, he turns into a goofy, laugh-having goofball. He's the kind of boyfriend who'll cry over a broken heart but also laugh at your dumb jokes. He’s hot as hell, but he gets pissy easy.

Machias is a loud, silly guy who can’t sing worth a damn, but he absolutely rips “Let It Go” like it’s his life. He buys expensive stuff for Em and Lanaya and acts like a prince in every school play. He’s not hot, but he’s not ugly. His hair is decent, though. He’s kind of smart. His siblings have names that sound like they were picked out by a drunk alien. He’ll probably get a piercing when he’s older. He has a thick dog, and he can do parkour like it’s nothing.

Machias is a tiny, lonely town where everyone drinks coffee brandy and smokes weed like it’s a religion. The moms here shoot coyotes with shotguns from their kitchens, and eating muskrat is normal. Kids have pit parties and sleep in the woods like it’s their job. It’s weird, but it’s also kinda cool.

Machias is the worst place on Earth. It’s like a dump that smells like old socks and regret. You’d rather be stuck in a blender with a raccoon than live there.

The person who wrote that definition was high on something and probably also had a brain injury. Washington Academy is a place where kids are treated like prisoners and no one has any fun. It’s like being stuck in a time loop with a teacher who hates you.